Holland dayz.

Pretty simple. Needs demystification. All you have to know is that you're essentially making a hot mayonnaise. In a way.

A recipe that can be fifty-folded or not:

2 egg yolks
juice of half a lemon
salt
sriracha <- integral

Before you stir the previous together, melt a half-pound of butter down. Leave to cool to room-temp.

Stir the previous together in a metal mixing bowl. If you have gas heat, so much the better. Electric? Shit. Your bad. This can still be done though:

Light a burner (electric or otherwise), and put the stirred ingredients over said heat. Begin diligently whisking them together, periodically taking them off the heat from time to time. Electric's gonna take more time than gas, which'll happen in a flash, but once you get to "ribbon stage" <- a term utilized because when you take the whisk and pick up the cooking egg yolk mass and you're able to make a figure-eight(8) within it, you're done cooking the hollandaise, this is when you take it away from the heat; but first, dampen a towel, ring it out, roll it together, snap someone in the ass with it, and conform it into a circle. Place said bowl of hollandaise on top, and begin whisking the aforementioned melted butter into it. Take your time, and let the butter go in at a slow pace.

Once it's together, stir it over your favourite poached eggs, fish, steak, whatever.

No sauce should EVER be so mystical.

luv,
s